While i was gone this week someone sent me this message:
“Remember how much we all hate you this week!”
to which i later replied “It’s raining outside and i blame you!”
This started when Doug – using Lauren’s phone – typed in “i hate you” on a text message and put Felicia’s number in… waited a bit, then hit send.
i said if i got a message saying “i hate you” i’d feel super encouraged.
Back in the day Cindy Tirey said Mark and i had the lave language of discouragement. We just razz on each other. And seriously, i feel loved. i mean, you don’t say mean things about a person (at least not to their face) unless you feel good about the friendship. i’d never tell person i actually thought was stupid they’re stupid. Or call someone a jerk if i really thought they were a jerk.
My friend Al i call each other jerks all the time, and whenever we do, it’s like we’re saying “i love you man”
One time, one of my good friends – Scott – was telling me about all the girl problems he was having. And i just started laughing – at him. “I’m sorry man, i’m sorry i’m laughing at you.” “No, it’s good. It helps me feel normal. i’m glad you’re laughing at me.” And he was being serious. When he did meet the girl of his dreams he asked me to be in his wedding. My great counseling skills i tell you.
Scott and i also discussed how we hate it when we say something like “I’m such an idiot” And a girl (because no guy would do this to another guy) says “No you’re not!”
Seriously, i don’t think i’m stupid or an idiot. But now i think you are because you think that i think that. (at least that is what Scott & i think).
The better response “Yeah you are!”
So, i think there is something great about trash-talking or saying i hate you or laughing at someone.
It can be delicate. And some people can’t pull it off. You don’t poke fun at someone when their team just lost a big game. i hate the cubs, but i wait before i say haha. You don’t poke fun at someone’s biggest insecurity (eyebrows, giant adam’s apple). And i think if it’s something that you really think you probably shouldn’t do it. i guess it’s in the attitude.
Everyone said they’d send me messages telling me they hate me… but only Steph did… and then at one point last week i said i think Steph must be the only person who cares for me – she’s the only one who has said i hate you. But now Jeanne & Sarah have joined in…
And then this week – without any of this context- i met a guy and when he was leaving, Mark said “it was great to meet you” And i followed it up with “it was horrible to meet you” And he just laughed and had a big smile and said “yeah, i know”
i hate all you jerks.